Are you not entertained?


Dis mrng I wanted to annoy ppl who flw me here on my blog with lingo. So here I’m, typng wrds tht miss lettrs here n der. Tryng my best to do it but it’s not enuf. Have u noticed no we also change spellings of wrds so dey r short n tak less time to type?

Or ShuD I TyPe In KeWl LanguaGe?

“Hey! I heard that u a playah? Uhh.. hi, um da coach.” Said a woman on her WhatsApp status. What the duck? (Because fuck is too mainstream but fuck it, no duck it. Man, fuck the duck. No, don’t.) Why though? I was never a playah, heck, I never even knew what it meant. Since u da coach, teach me, maybe?

A few years ago, like a decade ago (decade has a few years in it, right? Do I even make sense?). Fuck it. Fuck, I said it again. I must stop it. So, a few decades ago, oh, hell no! A few years ago, there was this girl I asked for directions in my native language and do you know how she responded?? “Wheywt?” See? I don’t even know how to spell it so I made it up myself. I mean, it’s simple, plain old ‘what’ pronounced in the grossest way possible to show she’s got attitude. Why though? English is just another language which I don’t know why people fancy all the time. Why’s it something to show off?

Don’t copy my attitude, I have my own’. How the hell can I copy your attitude? Are you a xerox copier? The same girl who’s so proud of her poshness once texted me, “werau”. I mean, what the fuck does that even mean? I mean, it doesn’t necessarily mean. Does it? What am I blabbering about? God! But yeah, what did she want to say? There were no punctuations either! Was that a question or a statement? Or an expression? A good ten minutes later, I decoded it to be “where are you?” Because she’s been waiting for me. How’s that posh, babe? I sound like a low class lackey compared to ya, gal. I once texted my friend that I’m waiting for him and his reply was “w8” what the fuck, man? And done even get me started about those who reply “f9, wbu?” when asked “how’ve you been?” What the hell is wbu? Oh, wait a sec, that lazy ass said “what about you?” Man! Lingo gets to my nerves.

To all those daddy’s little princesses, who blow the candles and kiss the earth on your birthdays, the introverts who are so extroverted and grumbling fake bibliophiles you rock!

Oh, m sry, I frgt abt mah lingo.

Uh ah nawt osum, ah am.

U bad, um ua dad.

And finally,

U da playah, um da coach.

I hope I annoyed you enough to stop reading my posts. Thank you.

Let there be my palm in your face!

(Huhuhaha)


Disclaimer: for all the morons who’re offended, it’s not my intention hurt anyone’s feelings. JK! It’s all in good humour.πŸ˜›πŸ˜›

47 Comments Add yours

  1. Thls is tha kewlest lanjuag

    Like

  2. Hiiii…. This is a sleepy head commenting under this video, but it suddenly dawned over me… That someone might have posted….πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    Well! Dr frnd, dis pst is vry kewwlll… I rlly lyk Ur blg… Red ma frst pst😁😁😁

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well…. I am sleepy enough to call it a video… My sleep’s got no chill🀣🀣🀣

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Nour R. says:

    Um what XD
    This is thoroughly confusing. I think you’re deleting too many letters XD
    Call me an old soul, but the only ones I use are ‘ttyl’ ‘lol’ ‘Gn’ and ‘Ig’. What’s up with all the others? I mean, why do they expect us to instantly know its meaning?

    The real question: why on earth would you talk to that girl?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Now this comment surpasses my post.🀣🀣🀣 And what the hell is Ig?
      Which girl are you referring to?

      Like

      1. Nour R. says:

        It’s I guess. I say it often sooooo
        I say things like ‘prolly’ so I’m not sure if I’m like her XD: ‘The same girl who’s so proud of her poshness once texted me, β€œwerau”’

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Hhahaa! Fine!
          The girl was my ex.🀣

          Like

            1. πŸ˜›πŸ˜›πŸ˜›

              Like

            2. Nour R. says:

              I’m not even going to ask why XD

              Liked by 1 person

            3. In what context though?

              Like

            4. Nour R. says:

              I guess I can’t process that people like these exist and people actually like them. While there are plenty of fun potatoes that are underrated XD Ah, society. The popular’s are ‘posh’ and stuff…I’m so not looking forward to seeing them after a month in my classroom *sigh*

              Liked by 1 person

            5. Come take a walk with me, I’ll show you plenty. Suit yourself.

              Like

  4. Sid says:

    I hop I dyd b4 readn dis. Just kdng πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. It was hilarious and annoying too πŸ˜£πŸ˜‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahah! Rest in peace, brother!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I luv dis. Gud wrk Bro. 😻
    Eating up words purposely like that makes me feel like a traitor. 😹
    Thankyou for giving me a headache. πŸ€—

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, behen!
      Aur Han, aapko headache Dena Mera farz hai.

      Like

      1. Het yu πŸ˜’πŸ˜’πŸ˜’

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Lyk I care😝

          Like

          1. Bas karo sach me sar dard horaha abbb 😹😹

            Liked by 1 person

  6. Mermaid says:

    Wow!
    It was fun and actually made sense, I am too annoyed of people who don’t respect language, be it any language.
    I hope all the people with filthy “attitude” read thisπŸ˜‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I hope so too! I hate lingo.
      We even got predictions and autocorrect, why not use them? It’s not like we have restricted character count like before.πŸ˜‚

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Anisha says:

        This is so true! Even when there are multiple options in smartphones, there are few who just want to irritate us using such lingo.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I know right!
          Thq Anisha.πŸ˜›

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Anisha says:

            My pleasure πŸ™‚

            Liked by 1 person

      2. Mermaid says:

        Exactly πŸ˜‚

        Liked by 1 person

  7. A good ten minutes later, I decoded it to beΒ β€œwhere are you?”–πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™€οΈπŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™€οΈ

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Heheh! There you are, lady. Took ya long enough.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Again …she’s meandering in late…πŸ˜†πŸ˜†

        Liked by 1 person

        1. She always does!
          Why don’t you tell her?

          Like

          1. Oh I do…. she’s irresponsible.πŸ™„πŸ˜œ

            Liked by 1 person

            1. She’s gonna pay for this!

              Liked by 1 person

  8. Ellen says:

    U da man! Hy 5! πŸ˜›

    Liked by 1 person

    1. 🀣🀣🀣
      U da gal! Hy fy!

      Like

      1. Ellen says:

        I m gal? Din noe.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Getting into my groove, yeah. πŸ˜‚

          Like

          1. Ellen says:

            My head’s already hurting. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

            Liked by 1 person

            1. I’m gonna make it explode.

              Like

            2. Ellen says:

              Hahaha that was your plan all along na? πŸ˜‚

              Liked by 1 person

            3. You have no idea, sister! 😎

              Like

            4. Ellen says:

              Boo, brotha! You are a bother. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜

              Liked by 1 person

            5. Ellen says:

              πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

              Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s