Eyes shut tight, I started counting sheep. One sheep, two sheep, fuck! I can’t sleep. Mosquitoes play symphonies, ceiling fan is slow and squeaks. I wish this unto no one, this fate of a sweating body and an itchy crotch.

If there’s any species that never runs out of food, it’s mosquitoes. Those assholes feed off of blood and it’s us who bear the name of being blood thirsty. Ironic, huh? I remember seeing a big, jet black mosquito which looked like it was bitten by a radioactive whatever the fuck it might’ve been. Life is a bitch, even to mosquitoes. The poor guy was trapped in a spider web and was struggling to free himself. Oh wait! It’s a female anopheles. How do I know? I don’t know shit. It’s a wild guess.

How do you know if a mosquito is a male or female? Do they have genitals? I mean, they’re dickheads for sure. So there’s this thing called proboscis, the male ones have longer proboscis (ding dong) and the female proboscis is thinner and more fine tuned to find human hosts. Males feed on nectar, females feed on blood. Ahem!!

Interesting thing is, the feathery proboscis; fuck proboscis, it’s too complicated to say out loud, let’s say antenna; the male antenna is used to locate females! Perverse pieces of shit.

These guys have found their purpose in life! Males live to fuck, females live to reproduce! Goddamnit! Isn’t that something to live by?? But unfortunately, these species can’t make out (not makeout) who’s male and female so they recognise each other depending on how fast their wings beat. The lower frequencies are the ladies, of course, nature is a misogynist. Okay, I’m not gonna go there. Fuck that.

Why am I even talking about this shit? I have no idea. I’m going back to sleep while these mosquitoes go fuck themselves (and suck my blood for iron).

Nighty night, fellas.

229 thoughts on “Mosfuckingquitoes

            1. You should use others…. It is good to communicate with friends…. I have account in facebbok, instagram, twitter…. But rarely use it…. Whatsapp, thats better….


            2. You must draw one picture for me and post it…. You have to write a fun stuff and next this picture…. I hope these won’t happen this year…. Do you???


            3. Thats true actually…. I appreciate that…. The huge suspense you gave on that day, I expected it in a different way…. But thts ok…. I am happy with these posts…. Post the sketch now…. I want to comment first….


          1. Mosquitoes aren’t actually most attracted to humans. Only female mosquitoes bite, and they seek out vertebrates to bite to obtain the nutrients to properly develop eggs. When given the choice, biting mosquitoes generally opt for smaller animals.


  1. Bhaiyaaaa, how do you do this? Kitnaaaa badhiya likhe ho ye. Stream of conscious. 🤭 Dusri baar padha tab bhi hansi aayi. 🤣 This is the height of creativity. Mosquito pe bhi likhdiye, how generous. You gave attention to them. 🥳 Abi wo aapko aur jyada attention denge.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aap na comments ka training shuru kardo. Kitna mast comment karte, like I literally wait for your comment every time I post.
      And I really miss seeing you here these days. Mosquitoes pe taras aata hai. 😬
      Irony ye hai na, ke wo mere hi blood peene aate, mera khud ka khoon nhi.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Arey yaar bhaiya, I always feel bad ki mera comment kabhi justice nai kar paata logon ke post ko. 😭 Humko criticism subject me criticise karna bhi nai sikhaya. I wanted to learn that. Mai youtube se seekhungi mast details fir aungi comment karne. 🤩
        Mai hu idhar hi. Sab dekh rahi hu. 😼
        Mosquito se dosti karlo na, friendship rules ke hisaab se he can’t bite you. 🤭


            1. 🙄 Aise mat bolo. Aaj ek aur cheez seekhi hu. It’s a literary device called as invective. When you insult someone in very izzatdaar language, then it’s caled invective. 🤭🤭


  2. Bharath…you know what, I am laughing since I have read your post. So much of hard work you have put in the research of mosquitoes 😂 (nation wants to know why?)
    Sir..!! You could have pinged me..I would have told you how to differentiate between them, why to worry in searching which mosquito is having proboscis( who does that?) 🤭
    Male mosquitoes avoid human contact, you will never find them around you…those are female mosquitoes making annoying noise, they are the bloodsuckers, wanting nutrition from your blood to develop their eggs😂 ( so, be a generous human being)

    You would have got tired till now😂
    Good morning bdw✨


    1. Hahaha…
      I knew only female anopheles mosquitoes feed on human blood but I wanted to dig deeper. I wouldn’t have known the antenna length and other feathery features if I hadn’t read about mosquitoes. How do I ping you? I don’t know what time you come to WordPress, you just disappear, commenting would result in delayed responses. So I thought I’d do this myself.
      I am generous but they’re atrocious. They don’t even ask, they suck. Literally.
      I’m a single guy, why do I give my blood to raise their kids???
      I’m glad I could make you laugh, that’s an achievement I guess.
      Good morning!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. That’s good, you researched😂 tell me more if you get to know something different and how they reproduce is the most complicated part😂
        I beg your pardon sir, my all apologies to you, that I don’t respond on time.

        And they will never ask you😂 that is what you call female power, they can do anything to feed on your blood, so that their kids can be healthy..
        And one more thing..
        Most female mosquitoes only suck blood in the early mornings before sunrise and after they seek shelter during the hottest part of the day😂
        ( Stay aware)

        Liked by 1 person

            1. Achwaa listen .
              These are a most disgusting, mischievous and evil arthropods😂 I don’t like them at all…

              They are omnivores… nocturnal and fast runners( that everyone must have noticed)
              And differentiating between them, is very difficult 😅
              To be continued…


            2. Haina..!! (Well, forensic science thing is totally different)
              What you study?
              If you want to know more about cockroaches ( the most interesting things) I can send you a link…I can’t write all here..!!😁


            3. Yeah…there is..!!
              But, I haven’t studied that yet.
              I am in a preparatory phase. I am more into clinical psychology thing..!!

              Your call..!! But, if you need my help..I am here😁


      1. I don’t know if you are the sinister type or not, but why don’t you try to kill them? Even better if you kill with your bare hands. It can be fun.


            1. Cool!
              I am getting better. I keep my eye on the movement of the mosquito. It likes to get near humans. I wait for the right moment and bamm!! They are gone for good.

              Liked by 1 person

  3. Lol. This was hilarious 😂. I hate mosquitoes too and I’ve written a lot about them. Have you had a chance to read those posts?
    Also: that was a lot of info about mosquitoes. I didn’t know about that probo.. thingy.


            1. Hahaha good question…. Wo kia a na.. mjhy time pass knna k liy na kisi bb chz ki zaroorat nai a .. mre apni aio dnnia ma ma us ma busy hti hu


  4. Bantering Bharath,

    You’re such a hypocrite. You keeping abusing us on and on as if you’re the king of being nice and good. But you know what, you’re an evil, murderer!! 

    Like how when you enjoy your chicken curry, you literally take the life away. We just want some little blood, to give birth to our own. 

    And while you complain about out noise, how we can’t just keep quiet. Mister, don’t you know, that’s the frequency needed for us to fly. And what do you think happens when you walk, do you know the number of little ants and other creatures you killed. You’re a fucking murderer!! A killer without a purpose. 

    Yes, we have loads of sex and we reproduce. Why should you have a problem with that? Just because your life is fucked up with human norms, job and whatnot… Does it mean we should live like you? We’d rather die than live like you!

    And while you kill us while we’re out on hunt for food, do you know the ones you kill are the pregnant lot. Oh man! How can you be so cruel?! You kill our wives and our babies too. 

    The mosquito population

    Shreya really likes this post though! 🤪😂😂

    Liked by 7 people

    1. I’ll get to you on this personally, okay? Because a comment that big requires a lot of patience and energy which I don’t have right now.
      And this coming from a person who eats meat is pure freaking hypocrisy. And nowhere in this post have I justified killing. We only hunt things that harm us and that’s survival mechanism.
      Thanks btw.

      Liked by 1 person

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