Things

I always thought the noises inside conch shells are voices of spirits trapped inside and cawing crows, ancestors paying visits. Clouds became grounds for castles and air carried whispers from time immemorial. There were thunder and lightning because gods were in battle and rain was celestial tear stops (or god taking a shower). When I…

Kaisan ba

Oh yeah! Thank you for asking me. Let’s not talk about life, let it be. Don’t bother asking what ails me, my good sire, I might not return the favour. Talk to me about everything, talk to me about nothing but don’t ask me how I’m doing. I’m fine. I’ve always been. I will be.…

Look

Y’know there’s a solution to every problem, don’t you? if there’s no solution, then it’s not your problem. Oh I know you don’t agree, darling. I agree there are things that lead to a dead end. Your broken heart may sing soulful melodies as you walk down a thorny path barefoot; what else can we…

I close my eyes to tell myself nobody’s looking, I play deaf and now, nobody’s talking. My legs hurt, been running for long; my eyes bleed when I dream of where I belonged. The lips are sealed, no truth is revealed for we believe in a lie; faces concealed. The stories I’ve known, the weakness…

I..uh…

Aswathy says this is me. I think. Sometimes it’s all I can do; sometimes it’s what I cannot. Sometimes it’s not the time, sometimes it’s just sometimes. It’s just time or maybe it isn’t; I don’t know. When I want to know, I don’t know what I have to know. When I do, I don’t…

Woke

I’ve dreamt for long Of wings, of sins, of air that fills and the voice that sings; for this heart of mine has mourned for long, of words that slipped, of tears spilt and life I’ve lived. Wake me up, stranger, tell me what I missed; if you hear regrets, put me back to sleep.

Causality

It is a world of consequences. One thing causes another and it’s an undeniable fact. Sometimes you get your ass kicked by an asshole and sometimes, it’s because you are the asshole. The action is a consequence and the action has a consequence. How you see the world depends on how you perceive things. You…

Dafuq!?

She turned towards her best friend who was in dire need of someone to help her out of the rut she’s in and said “why don’t you seek Prem’s help? He still loves you.” “I humiliated him, rejected him multiple times, made a fuss out of nothing, slapped him and kicked him out of my…

Acceptance.

Sealed lips don’t always hide stories, tired eyes aren’t always wary; scars remain scars and silence, silent. Why do we look for meaning and purpose behind usual things? What did we ever get from romanticism and exaggeration? Momentary bliss? Like sex? Sometimes we just have to accept. That people are assholes and that’s it.

Times

“God has a plan for you” So I’ve heard. Whatever path you take, it’s for good. Bad days pave way for good days. Do they? Is that what you tell yourself? Hard times test you; make you a better person. Tell me this, o honest denizen, do they make you better or broken? Broken isn’t…

Shit

“When I start working, I’m gonna get busy! A job I love that pays me well. Not a minute to spare.” That’s what I told myself through school and college and here I am, sitting on the western toilet seat wondering what I’m doing with my life and why there’s a phone in my hand…

State

Walk away. I’ve got nothing to offer; not even kind words. Look around, look at you, look at me. What do we have in common? Nothing that you can see or perceive. For me, what makes you happy is a dream. What you dread is a wound that doesn’t heal. Walk your way, I’ll walk…

Freedom

She showed me a balloon, said it personified freedom. I asked her “why?”, “it floats around, goes wherever it wishes to, that’s why.” But a thread knot keeps it from deflating. There’s no absolute freedom. It’s a myth. You are tied even when you’re free. (Have I told you the air gradually decreases and balloon…

I don’t know

How do you know someone? What do you say to that? We tend to explain under what circumstances we met and what led us here. Does that mean we know them?? We recognise people based on their traits and interactions. That’s getting acquainted but do we know them? If we don’t, how do we know?…

Happiness

There are paths to happiness. They say happiness is in you, you have to look within. It’s often said that happiness is a journey, not a destination. You move through it, not reach. What do you notice? Where did sadness go?? Look closer, it has always been here. Suffering makes you realise what happiness feels…

Eventuality

They say there’s light at the end of the tunnel but how long is this tunnel?? How bright is the light? Why wasn’t I told that it gets bleaker the closer we move? The night has to end and so does morning; I think it’s useless to compare and contemplate because what happens happens. They…

Liars

Numbness has lost its meaning. You felt no pain before but now you do and you chose to ignore, say you’re numb. I see you lying in the bed, staring at the ceiling. All the pain inside amplified by hope is eased by your dreams. That’s the thing about dreams, you live them like they’re…

Drowning

Everything’s gonna be alright. What an illusion! A hope inspiring lie! But why? I walk the same road I was on twelve years ago, in shoes that bared my toes. The boots are now strong and the story is too long, unfit to be a song. My shoulders that were once free now carry the…

Normal.

What is normal but the feeling of comfort and relevance? You might tell me I’m wrong, say normal is something that’s acceptable and repeating; now tell me this, would you accept discomfort when it’s not needed? Would you tolerate if it’s irrelevant? Whatever happens is normal until you decide it isn’t. What is normal to…

Find

I’ve wandered around, person to person, knocking, from one heart to another. I searched for pieces that went missing, parts of me I’ve given away, seeking acceptance, accepting judgements, craving validation. Sympathy ain’t cheap, I tell you, you have to earn it. It ain’t honest either, they just show it. The more you want something,…

Motivation.

We only got one life. Everything that you have or had won’t matter sooner or later; the ones that looked and felt so important to you will become obsolete. The constant pressure of making a living and a will to survive robs us off of the life in the present moment. Can we stop for…

Morning thoughts.

Y’know, sometimes I wish there’s something called fate. It’s wishful thinking and everything that’s predetermined sounds like a dream come true because you’d know if you’d succeed or suck balls but we’re stuck in this partly predictable consequential mess of a world that has unpredictable outcomes. Everything affects everything. Fuck y’all.