Favours.

I wish I could watch the stars all night. Alone. I ask nothing of the world, I’m too generous for that. All I need is some time alone. Looking outside the balcony is painful, everything is so far away. This is when I feel like the world is being a bitch to me. I just…

Dark blues.

Echoing throughout these walls, I hear; in this emptiness I see, those long lost years, the newfound fears and abuse. We hold hands, we aren’t together, we say things but barely talk to each other. There’s no forgiveness surrounding us; there are no memories, only nightmares and tremors. All those nights blanketed by the stars,…

Wetness.

Why doesn’t rain bring down the skies with it? For the love of the world? Or is it powerless? “For god’s sake! shut your fucking mouth.” I tell myself and stare at the sky, the wretched cloudy sky for this downpour early in the morning. An brisk walk was all I wanted. This is nature…

Embrace – collaboration

In sickness, I wrote of health; in strength, I whined about ailment. Never once has one thing held true for itself, never once have I tried to embraceWhat I had been offered for there was no satisfaction in earthly events. It was fabrication that revealed traces of concealed intentions and sweet deceit.I await rains while…

Migraine

There’s a riot inside my head. I lay my ass down on the staircase, not fatigued but just in case. A million thoughts surge through my brain; a fatal collision and a decided division between the past and present indicate an unwanted descent of my sanity. Insanity. I laugh like a clown, draw doodles on…

Passing

It went up and down; the road to me, appeared like a wave. I see people go about and I watch, like a tombstone at a grave. Sometimes I wish there was an epitaph engraved, on my forehead so people can read; what I was and what I could never be. The wind strokes my…

I..uh…

I think. Sometimes it’s all I can do; sometimes it’s what I cannot. Sometimes it’s not the time, sometimes it’s just sometimes. It’s just time or maybe it isn’t; I don’t know. When I want to know, I don’t know what I have to know. When I do, I don’t want to. It’s complicated. Everything…

Alive.

Tear through my tissuesSever my nervesPush in deepPull it out, I won’t weepLook me in the eyeTell me it’s okayTell me I’ll liveLet me bleed

Tolerance – collaboration

You say you like pain, addicted even. Does tolerance come that easy? If it did, why are we even alive? You say you feel pain everyday, that it’s killing you; but what if I tell you that it’s pain that keeps you alive, pull you away from death, stops you at the brink? You say…

Broken things – collaboration

She had a thing for everything broken. Believed broken things had better stories to tell and treasured them all. Bits and pieces of broken bangles, Cute little charms from a broken bracelet, Her grandpa’s broken vintage radio, Her father’s broken watch and as she grew up, Broken hearts! Time has passed and broken hearts left…

Times

“God has a plan for you” So I’ve heard. Whatever path you take, it’s for good. Bad days pave way for good days. Do they? Is that what you tell yourself? Hard times test you; make you a better person. Tell me this, o honest denizen, do they make you better or broken? Broken isn’t…

Shit

“When I start working, I’m gonna get busy! A job I love that pays me well. Not a minute to spare.” That’s what I told myself through school and college and here I am, sitting on the western toilet seat wondering what I’m doing with my life and why there’s a phone in my hand…

State

Walk away. I’ve got nothing to offer; not even kind words. Look around, look at you, look at me. What do we have in common? Nothing that you can see or perceive. For me, what makes you happy is a dream. What you dread is a wound that doesn’t heal. Walk your way, I’ll walk…

Dear writers

Writers are weird. I wonder why every one of them thinks it’s only a woman that feels pain. She knew it, she did that, she hid this, she fought that Don’t men feel a thing? Have our sensory organs numbed down? Why do you associate pain with a gender when it’s the same for everyone?…

Happiness

There are paths to happiness. They say happiness is in you, you have to look within. It’s often said that happiness is a journey, not a destination. You move through it, not reach. What do you notice? Where did sadness go?? Look closer, it has always been here. Suffering makes you realise what happiness feels…

Shamble – collaboration

It’s real, it’s right yet unusual . Do I say it? Or just watch us moving apart? The dream that I want to chase, I let it pass me by, within the blink of an eye. Who decides fate? Sometimes it’s best to let things be, hoping to escape misery. But sometimes I wonder; What…

Liars

Numbness has lost its meaning. You felt no pain before but now you do and you chose to ignore, say you’re numb. I see you lying in the bed, staring at the ceiling. All the pain inside amplified by hope is eased by your dreams. That’s the thing about dreams, you live them like they’re…

Drowning

Everything’s gonna be alright. What an illusion! A hope inspiring lie! But why? I walk the same road I was on twelve years ago, in shoes that bared my toes. The boots are now strong and the story is too long, unfit to be a song. My shoulders that were once free now carry the…

Love.

“When you’re in love, you’re born anew” they say, those romantics whose hearts wandered astray; but who knew? It’s suicide and then you come back to life and there’s repetition, until you die.

You and I

I’m you, when you fight yourself, resisting change, looking for something new and crying over what to choose. I’m you, when you are recluse, craving company; scared knowing what you’d lose. I’m you, when you laugh in the moments of indecisiveness, not knowing what to do. You’re me if you think what I say is…

Insides. -collaboration

A white light takes over the night; I am as cold and dead inside. Shrouded in darkness, I lay and stare at the starless sky, gazing into the past, lost in the dwindling moments. I lose myself for the first time; don’t know what peace feels like, it’s been a while. A fog descends from…

I Stand

I stand barefoot, soiling my feet. It rained in the morning, sunny in the afternoon and is freezing at night. I hear chirping birds, cawing crows, gentle breezes, wild winds and howling canines. I start to erode but I stand. I stood still. I still stand.

Waters.

I swam an ocean of memories and each drop, an injury.

Mercy

I swear to you I’m lying, it’s true. I could’ve said it, I could’ve killed you and you’d have no clue. Bare handed, I stand before you, all I have are my words, they’re naked and few; they burn through your soul, fire in the hole! I know my way around and I shall break…

Escape

In the corners of my mind, along the borders undefined hide the thoughts as my consciousness slowly dies. Whatever cries inside, whatever lives despite, when nothing goes right, wait for tonight and I try; try to run out of sight.

I gotta stop.

Blood exuded from cuticles. It crawled down my fingers, reaching the palm; I close my fist tighter to bleed more, pressing harder. A sharp pain surges into my brain, I’m conscious and vain. It tastes sour, this blood of mine; I hear the rain and it’s half past nine. Dinner is served.

Flow.

One by one, they took the stones out from the wound; I got tears in my eyes but I laugh, joke around and make myself at ease. “Whatever gets stuck gives you an infection” they said, still working. I see flesh hanging on my knee, could hardly fold it right. No painkiller was given, they…

Lost story

Ours is a story written in the sands, gone with the wind and love, washed away by waves of suspicion. Whatever was left of the memories burned in altars of our minds and here we stand hanging on to fallacies. I’ve been there before, to that heartbreak shore, wetting my feet in the tides of…

A writer’s whisper – collab

The inkling in my handSeeks refuge,Urging me to jot it down,A revolt rages within. My soul tries to breaks the walls of the dungeon,It craves to be let out;The pen is a prison,Paper is the land far away.Letting go would mean pain,There is no liberty without a price;Writing is evil,Something that I need to survive….

Scars – collaboration

Tisha and I wanted to write on “scars” but I was clueless as ever. This is what I finally came up with: Underneath my skin are tissues and blood; they know your touch. My senses have recognised you long before you laid your hands on me; like on a quest for holy grail, you searched…